for your consideration
in the silence
— — — — — —
I purged all my unfinished posts today.
Well crafted thoughts, sentences, paragraphs, sent back to the ether.
I could say, “This is a ‘fresh start’.” And commit to doing better.
But, no. It is a healing purge. Like a detox, or a fever.
I have been in a dark place — afraid, angry, guilty, ashamed.
Fear and guilt are often our biggest foes.
The things we haven’t done and the fear of what might happen. These stop us. They eat our brains and murder our motivation.
The fact that there are things that cannot be changed, or should be done NOW(!), or might never happen doesn’t matter to that small part of the brain that has been there from the beginning of life on earth to keep us safe.
The problem is that only by being open, creating, and telling our stories can we move into the future that may be brighter, happier, and fulfilling. And if we don’t quite get there we can have some pride in the fact that we tried and can try again.
It’s the “fail” and “fail bigger” meme.
Not that this pays the bills or is safe. But, it strikes a blow for your personal beingness. We, you or me or anyone is worthy of being a creator.
Personally, I have bills that need to be paid, commitments to keep, calls to make, and paperwork and miscellaneous things to be done very soon. And, I sit here typing, trying to explain and empower others to create.
Life is dangerous. I can’t tell anyone how to be safe…I can’t even tell you WHY. There are fearful things all around me and I still keep building this path in hopes of finding the small treasures and leaving a few of my own.
It’s probably that little ADHD part of my brain that tells me that writing this is more important and interesting than all the other important crap that “has to be done”. You may have your own reason to write or be reading this.
It is vital for us to share our stories, rants, thoughts, and poems and whatever we can get in front of someone else.