The winds of the soul have left my sails.
It’s not that there’s nothing to do. My should-do-list is long.
Thank the heavens this doesn’t happen often. My mind is aswirl with thoughts and ideas. But, there is no oomph behind me.
I know that some of this (maybe all of it) is symptomatic of overwhelm and depression. Yeah, I’ve been here before.
The emotions compete for my attention. Anger. Sadness. Fear. Joy. Love. Regret. Boredom. (It helps to name them.)
Isn’t that a fine word? There are many writers here that will tell you how to get motivated or stay motivated or that you don’t need it.
It means “impetuous to get going”. But, despite all the demanding emotions, all that I’ve managed to do is read a bit and start writing here.
I would normally write this in a journal where I could scribble, scratch, and doodle.
Today I decided to make my quandary legible and organized. Perhaps, to sort things out better.
Creativity helps. Even in this small form. Expressing myself, communicating, getting things out of my head makes me feel more calm. I’m breathing deeper now.
It’s an amazing world. It is easy to get caught up in all the “should s” that are thrown in our faces every day. Or that we beat ourselves over the head with. I am a little rebellious sometimes (some might say often) and don’t readily buy into the way things should be.
What do you think?